The Onion’s Apple Friend Bar, and an alternative to Mr Key’s Kiwi/Panda swap?

This Onion piece was pretty good but the follow up headline that ends the item really hit the spot. I saw it when New Zealand was gripped by our PM’s daft idea of swapping Kiwi (birds) with China in return for Pandas as “an extension of the bond" between the countries”. Perhaps we should get a Tibetan Monk instead?

http://media.theonion.com/flash/video/embedded_player.swf    
New Apple Friend Bar Gives Customers Someone To Talk At About Mac Products